Saturday, October 31, 2009

The price of Happiness

I hear it all of the time, but I've never quite felt comfortable with it. A parent receives news from their child that should be met with disapproval, but instead they're told the famous "whatever makes you happy" phrase or "All I've ever wanted is for you to be Happy". Happy. Not good, not kind, not respectful, not even successful, just "Hey, whatever makes you happy". Am I the only one that sees a problem with this? People are always debating the cost of fame, the cost of success, even the cost of love, but what about the price of happiness? Is happiness or should happiness be our first and only goal in life? Of course everyone wants to be happy. We were not created for miserable lives, but the Bible clearly states: seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you. Seek God first, not dreams, not goals, not ambitions. What if a child's temporary happiness causes his eternal demise? What if His personal pursuit of happiness not only severs him from God's true plan for his life, but also costs the fulfillment of happiness for the lives of others? Is happiness the First thing that we should be teaching, or should it be that we receive merit and fulfillment when we do things the way that God intended. It is a hope and faith in God and that helps you to stand when times are tough. When you only seek your own contentment, where can you turn when you're in trouble? Parents, it is our job to give our children wise counsel, this includes sometimes not supporting a dream or pursuit that goes directly against God's Will and his Word. If we TRULY love our children, we'll let them know: I love you, but I can't support that decision. No matter what age your children are, they need to know that they have a solid foundation and support system that will guide them through life, not only for their happiness, but for their good. Children are born testing boundaries, they are always asssured when they know how far that they can go. Boundaries are not only meant to keep children from things, but also to protect what's within. Joy should be a focus for any family, but it should also be balanced with safety and responsibility. Happiness should not be taught as a goal, but rather a lesson, something that is achieved during or after the right decision has been made. Just a thought.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Are we together Mommy?

There has always been different ways of showing commitment. Yes, there's marriage, moving in together, and starting a family, but the first sure sign of showing that you belong to someone is when they hold your hand. It's a simple gesture, but one that makes you feel loved, secure, and taken care of. It's such a good feeling knowing that the person you care for is right next to you. I have to wonder why so many mothers have begun to neglect this simple ritual concerning their own children. I'm sure I'm not the only person who has noticed children who are extremely young coming down the street, appearing to be alone until you hear a loud voice from a stranger two feet ahead of them yelling "COME ON" or " WALK UP!". It may be just me, but I don't see how you can deny you children the security of knowing that they belong to you by taking the time to hold their hand. How many hit and runs or scraps and falls could have been avoided by just taking the time to extend your embrace and letting your child know"Mommy's here". This isn't meant to be a guilt trip, just a reminder that children need that sense of love and belonging that many of us like to receive in any relationship. They should learn love and belonging from family first. In today's world it's so easy to feel alone. Let's take the time to let our children know that they aren't neglected, but cherished. Just a Thought.

Question: What are some ways that you show your older children that you love them?

*Good ideas- Love can be expressed in many ways, even children may have specific ways of showing and receiving love. A great way to explore this topic is the book :The five love languages for kids by Dr. Gary Chapman

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Second Chances

Yesterday, My oldest son Micah was having a bad day. Actually his day started out fine, but when it was time for bed, he REALLY didn't want to go. Actually like any child, he NEVER wants to go to bed. He's always afraid that he's missing out on something. It would be SO great to wake up with that same type of childlike enthusiasm each day. Well, to make a long story short it became a frustrating evening. After he finally went to sleep, my husband Aaron and I had a talk. The next Morning when Micah woke up, the first thing I made sure to do was to give him a big hug,a kiss, and a smile . I wanted him to understand that what happened yesterday was over, and that he had a brand new chance to start over. After we hugged and I said "Good Morning" as cheerful as possible, He immediately looked up at me with those Bambi eyes and said "Mommy I'm sorry for not listening and for not following the rules last night". I told him "Micah, last night was last night, I forgive you. Now today it's a brand new day for you to make good choices". He smiled and went to play with his brother. As I watched him, I let our the biggest sigh of relieve. I realized what an Awesome gift that we all who've accepted Christ have, to start over, a new day. I like the way the movie Anne of Green Gables says it "Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it". When we think about it, God has been so good to us that we all have a second chance, and everyday to renew that chance when we mess up. I think if we really grasp this beautiful gift then we can learn from our children the feeling of waking up with excitement and expectation. It's so good to know that we love a God who is forgiving and loving. This a model that we can not only use for our children, but for ourselves. Just a Thought.

Friday, October 2, 2009

The value of a spiritual education

Today I wanted to talk a little bit about the goals we've placed on education. There has been a phenomenal increase of adults returning to school to receive an higher education while most college students are beginning to complete their Masters at record rates before even entering into the work force. While all of these efforts are certainly ones to be applauded I had to ask the question: With all of the emphasis being placed on acquiring knowledge and life skills how good of a job are we doing with balancing our kids formal education with their biblical education? The point of this inquiry is not to bash the school system or the importance of the work place, but simply to push us to ask ourselves this: who's job is it to teach our kids about God? church, sunday school (for those of us who actually make it..wink, wink) If our kids are learning "life skills" at school when are they being taught "life principles". The art of not only coping, but living life with a purpose other than just to get a 9-5 and to receive a paycheck. What seeds are we planting in our children today that makes them know that they need God for more than just a Sunday visit. There's a big difference between preparing you child for life and for "Eternal" life. I'm certainly not opposed to reading, writing, and arithmetic, and good grades are expected in my household. The thing that I really try to impart in my kids is a knowledge of who God is and a sincere love for him. I may not be able to answer every life question for them, but if I can connect them to the one (God) that does, then I feel that I've done my job. So, right after "regular" school homework, consider doing a little bible trivia or a mini bible study with your kids. You may be surprised at how much (or how little) they actually know. Just a Thought. Here's a list of some good children's bibles and books that I recommend:
God's Mighty Warrior Devotional Bible -Sheila Walsh
GiGi God's Little Princess Bible-Sheila Walsh
The One Year DEVOTIONS for Preschoolers-Crystal Bowman
The Manga Bible

*Good Idea: For every Christmas and Birthday add a new book from the Christian book store to your child's library. It may be as exciting as getting socks to them now, but like any necessity, it will be there for them when they really need it.

Question: How do you teach YOUR children about God?

Thursday, October 1, 2009

A little bit about Me

I decided What better time to start a blog than on the First day of October. So here I am! I wanted to share with Moms and women in general some of the issues that are going on today and affecting us as well as our children. There's alot of good things going on that we never hear about and quite a few disturbing things that we SHOULD know about. The first thing that you should know about me is that I'm a Christian wife and mother of 2 beautiful boys. My handsome husband and I have been married for 8 years now (boy time really flies) and our sons are 6 and 2 (quite a cute handful!)My sweetie and I met and married in college in Michigan and had our first son there. After he FINALLY completed his degree, we moved to Atlanta Georgia and I love it here! It's been 3 years and I find the South full of charm and beauty. My grandparents were born and raised in the south and passed down their history and values to my mother and me. Now here I am, a descendant of the windy city trying to turn my youngsters into TRUE southern gentlemen. Well, won't that be fun to watch? For now I'm content being a Happy homemaker, an avid reader, a faithful friend, a loving daughter, a devoted sister, and the creator of many projects that Lord willing I'll actually finish one day!lol.....so stay tuned

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